What am I doing on here?

This is my therapy.
It isn't really meant to be read by anyone. Anyone who does read it needs to be prepared to not like what they read. I accept no responsibility for feelings being hurt even though that is not in any way the intention. I have found so many times in the past that writing down my feelings and thoughts helps me to deal with them and that is the sole reason for this blog - nothing else.
Feel free to share in my thoughts, but I do not really want or need feedback.

That being said, if you do read it, I hope you can thereafter have some understanding of where I've been, what I've done and how it's affected me.

I've suffered from clinical depression for most of my life dating right back to my childhood. I probably would have recovered from the childhood traumas had I not then proceeded to spend 12 years married to the wrong man. This will all become more evident in my posts. I'm not saying my ex was a bad person, just that we should never have married and I was wrong to have worked so hard to keep the marriage together when it was such a poor match in the first place.

I've had various sessions of therapy and it was only the last set, based around schema therapy, that really helped to make my life make sense. That, coupled with the fact that I have now found my soul mate, is helping me to make quite a remarkable recovery, although there is still a very, very long way to go. I cannot emphasise enough how critical my relationship with Phil has been towards my recovery (and Lyta for that matter.) Everyone needs a "rock" in their lives and Phil is mine.